The Blanket Fairy: Fighting Pediatric Cancer with Sprinkles of Comfort

TOUCHSTONE THURSDAYS

by Alia Tarraf

Here is the proof fairies are real and you don’t need money to make magic.

In 2009, Kim Ortega was a work-at-home mom who had been selling clothes, fabrics and handmade blankets online for years.  It was more of a passion than a job since she didn’t really make a large profit from it.  Kim and her husband, John, who was an Agency Operator for Hertz, had a happy life, the parents of two beautiful children, Zachary (5) and Madyson (1).

Then John was laid off.  That’s when things hit rock bottom.  In January 2010, Kim and her two children watched John drive away from their home in Arizona so he could start a new job in Missouri.  It was the only work available and the family could only afford for him to go. 

Brokenhearted and knowing they wouldn’t see him for five months, Kim would lay awake at night, missing John.  On one of her sleepless nights, she was online and came across a prayer request for Layla Grace Marsh on Twitter.  Layla suffered from Neuroblastoma, a cancer of the network of nerves that carry messages from the brain throughout the body.  Kim’s heart went out to her.  She stayed up all night reading.  Layla’s story stuck with her and inspired Kim to begin following other children with cancer on Twitter, wondering what she could do to help. 

Then she had an idea.  The blankets.  Kim began to contact the parents of these children struck by cancer and offered to make a blanket for them. 

The response was quick, the demand was high and the work was rewarding.  Kim began going on Ebay to ask fabric vendors for discounts or if they were willing to donate.  Two out of three companies offered to donate their fabric and materials.  Kim was shocked.  And excited.  Here was something she could do to comfort others, and indirectly, comfort herself.

Word spread and people began asking if they could help too.  Soon, Kim had volunteers all over the country at their sewing machines.  She had become The Blanket Fairy.

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WHAT DOES THE BLANKET FAIRY OFFER?

Our mission is to make and donate as many blankets as possible to children with pediatric cancer.  We follow many blogs and websites and when we see a child that needs a lift in spirits while going through treatment, we contact their parents to ask if we can send their child a package.  The package includes: a handmade blanket, a pair of pajamas, a "The Blanket Fairy" T-shirt, slipper socks, coloring books, crayons, markers or paint, bubbles, glow sticks, books, a few toys and a handmade super hero cape.

   

 

WHY DID YOU FEEL IT WAS IMPORTANT TO GET INVOLVED IN THE FIGHT AGAINST CANCER?

When these kids are diagnosed, cancer is the last thing on their mind. Most families are not even aware of the symptoms. Once their child is diagnosed, they do not have time to do anything but care for their child. I feel it is up to all of us as a whole to raise awareness.
 

WHAT HAS BEEN THE BIGGEST SURPRISE IN BECOMING THE BLANKET FAIRY?

Support.  I thought I was just going to deliver a couple of things to the hospital. I decided to open The Blanket Fairy Facebook page and I just could not believe all of the support.  I am not rich financially but I am good at figuring out how to get things done so people reaching out really helped.

The biggest single surprise was from Ellen Degeneres.

In August of 2011, I sent Ellen a “Gold Package of Hope”, which included a beautiful blanket with her favorite football team’s colors: gold and black.  The gold represents childhood cancer.  I asked all of my fans to go onto her Facebook page and ask her to open the package.  A few hours later, a video was posted on The Ellen Show website.  My email blew up.  Hundreds of people were asking how they could help. They sent me packages with handmade blankets, toys, pajamas, socks.  Awareness was spread.  

  

HOW CAN SOMEONE GIVE AND/OR RECEIVE VIA THE BLANKET FAIRY?

My goal is to bring a smile to a child’s face while they are going through the fight of their life.  I follow many blogs and what I will do is if there is a child that needs a lift in spirits while going through treatment, I will contact their parents to ask about sending a package to their child.

The only requirement is that I get a picture of the child with their blanket and goodies so I can post pictures on the site so people can see where their donations are going.  I do not take requests because I pay for the shipping most of the time.  I will only approach parents once I know I have the funds to do so.  I do make a list and go down the list as I have the funds.

At the moment, I can only do this for children living in the United States due to the high cost to ship out of country.

HOW DO YOUR VOLUNTEERS HELP?

The volunteers make blankets or hold events to make blankets for me and some do toy drives.

  

Volunteers can sign up at:

http://theblanketfairy.weebly.com/about.html 

IF YOU WERE ABLE TO HAVE THE ENTIRE WORLD'S ATTENTION FOR FIVE MINUTES, WHAT WOULD YOU SAY?

I would tell them to look at their child and imagine for just a second, “What if my child was diagnosed with cancer?”

To learn more about The Blanket Fairy, visit: www.theblanketfairy.com

If you have a story idea for The Why? Foundation, please contact us at info@thewhyfoundation.org.

www.thewhyfoundation.org

Helping Others With What You've Got: How Alia Let Go Of Her Locks

THE WHY? FOUNDATION - TOUCHSTONE THURSDAY

by Why? Foundation Street Team Member, Alia Tarraf

I love having long hair.  Its part of my personality.  It tells the world a big part of who I am and what I'm feeling on any particular day.  I can wear it part way up on days I want to feel like a Disney princess.  Or pulled back in a bun when I mean business.  Or a messy ponytail when I feel artistic and creative.  Sometimes I even wear it down just because I want to hide from the world.

Like so many women, my hair is a part of who I am and very often, I've allowed it to define me.  We're told that its a part of our beauty.  And our beauty is so wrapped up in who we are and can unfortunately dictate our confidence levels.

So when I saw my friend, Julie, with a freshly shorn bob at a party after college one night, I marched up to her and demanded to know what happened to her long beautiful chocolate brown hair.  She replied nonchalantly, "I gave it to Locks of Love."  Oh great, some hippy dippy charity.  "What's that?"  I asked, bewildered.  "It's a charity that makes hairpieces for people who don't have hair due to a medical condition."

No.  No, I was not going to feel guilty for this.  Julie wasn't condemning me at all, she just simply told me what I had asked.  She had almost shrugged.  Shrugged off that she didn't care her long hair was gone.  Now, I know this all might sound incredibly vain and silly, but I had somehow linked my worth to my beauty, i.e. my hair.  Julie was helping someone else, and had the self-confidence to do it, and I didn't.

I went to bed that night and couldn't stop thinking about it.

I decided to go on the Locks of Love website, just to check it out.  Not that I would do anything.  It turns out that Locks of Love not only provides hairpieces for people who don't have hair due to a medical condition, they specifically help disadvantaged children under age 21 suffering from long-term medical hair loss from any diagnosis.

 "Our mission is to return a sense of self, confidence and normalcy to children suffering from hair loss by utilizing donated ponytails to provide the highest quality hair prosthetics to financially disadvantaged children.  The children receive hair prostheses free of charge or on a sliding scale, based on financial need."

Seriously?  Who are these people?  Because they just turned me into a jackass in about two seconds.  Was I really going to let my vanity and insecurity come before a disadvantaged child with no hair because of a medical diagnosis?  Who had I become?  My problems suddenly seemed super lame.  1. These kids are dealing with a medical condition, from alopecia areata to cancer.  2. They lose their hair because of it.  3.  They don't have the means to fix it.  Yeah, it was time to get over myself.  I needed to do this and if I lost my attractiveness, well, hopefully it would grow back.

I walked into the salon the next day.  I had googled salons in my area that were associated with Locks of Love and this one gave a free haircut with a hair donation.  They have them all over the country.  The hairstylist braided my hair, measured the minimum 10 inches required to donate, asked if I was ready, and cut it off.  I'm not going to lie, I may have cried a little.

The salon sent it in the mail to Locks of Love for me the next day.

I'm not saying you need to go out and cut off all your hair.  But I learned there are so many ways we can help others.  Something as small as donating your hair can go such a long way and mean so much to someone else.  This was a wake-up call.  Sometimes I get so focused on myself and can't see past my own nose.  Which, by the way, I wish was smaller.  But seriously, when I remember that so many others have been dealt a much harder hand, I am so humbled.  And I can help.  Even if I don't have the means.  I can donate my hair, I can run an errand, I can volunteer.

And you know what's funny?   I liked my bob.

~

Click Here To Learn More About Locks of Love.

A reminder from India Arie - I Am Not My Hair

SEVEN MONTHS PREGNANT AND DIAGNOSED WITH BREAST CANCER – HOW ONE WOMAN FOUND THE “SWEET SPOTS OF CANCER”

THE WHY? FOUNDATION - TOUCHSTONE THURSDAY

by Alia Tarraf

“I felt like I was really living before I got cancer.  But now I'm living in full color.  Just yesterday I drove ten hours round trip to surprise my husband at the finish line of his 100-mile Best Buddies bike race [for children with Down syndrome] he did in honor of our daughter, Sadie.  I brought Sadie with me.  It was a surreal adventure that I would have never thought about doing before the cancer.  It was an easy decision to drive the distance just to see Todd's face when he crossed the finished line.  I'm incredibly thankful to be a girl with an attitude of gratitude.  I'm now seeing all my lemons turn to lemonade and life is so sweet.”

Heidi Virkus, a vibrant stay-at-home 39-year old mother of three, was seven months pregnant when she was diagnosed with breast cancer.  It was early in the morning.  Her mother-in-law had just arrived to help her with the kids.  Ten days earlier she had found a lump that both she and her OB thought was just her mammary glands getting ready to produce milk.  Her mother-in-law had just shut the door when the phone rang.  It was Heidi’s doctor.  Everything stopped.  Heidi quickly walked into the garage, her full belly carrying her unborn child, and came undone. 

Already fighting Crohn’s disease, Heidi had to decide whether or not to have chemo during her last trimester.  What would it do to her healthy baby?  What would it do to her family?  She decided she had to take the chance in order to live.  So she could be there for her other children, Sam (8), Sophie (5), Sadie (3), her adoring husband, Todd, and the baby on the way.

After Heidi’s fourth chemo session, she gave birth to an unscathed, perfect little baby girl named Sarah surrounded by her cheering committee.  Two weeks later, she started another four rounds of chemo.  When that ended, she had a double mastectomy.  Then later, a total hysterectomy.  And after all that, she had final breast reconstruction.  Through it all, Heidi’s faith, family and friends lifted her up and helped her fight through, especially Sadie.  Sadie acts as an anti-depressant, teaching Heidi, along with her husband and other children, more about herself than anything or anyone ever could.

WHAT KIND OF CANCER DID YOU FIGHT?

I had breast cancer. It was an isolated tumor that did not spread to the nodes.

IS THERE A HISTORY OF CANCER IN YOUR FAMILY?

My aunt has ovarian cancer and my paternal grandparents had both lung and colon cancer.

DO YOU KNOW WHERE YOUR CANCER CAME FROM?

No, possibly my dad’s side.  I lived on the edge for many years, abusing my body and mind with behaviors that could have contributed, but I'm really not sure.

DID YOU THINK YOU WERE AT RISK?

No.  I have been eating healthy for the past sixteen-plus years, meditating daily and living an anti-cancer lifestyle.

WHAT WAS YOUR RECOVERY FROM SURGERY AND TREATMENT LIKE?

The anticipation was worse than the actual treatment.  I take longer to heal because I have Crohn’s disease.  The hardest part of the healing was after the double mastectomy.  I have a high threshold for pain but the drains and wounds gave me debilitating pain.  Losing my hair and lashes was incredibly humbling, especially for someone like me who is slightly hair-obsessed.  I love hair and makeup.

DID YOU EXPERIENCE ANY SIDE EFFECTS FROM TREATMENTS OR SURGERY?

Yes.  I used and still use acupuncture for the side effects which include: sensitive teeth, numb extremities, nausea, exhaustion, insomnia, light sensitivity, joint pain and hair loss.

WHAT IS YOUR MEDICAL MAINTENANCE SCHEDULE NOW?

Visiting my oncologist and surgeons every six months.

HOW IMPORTANT DID YOU FIND DIET AND EXERCISE IN GETTING THROUGH TREATMENT AND SURGERY?

Early in my chemo treatments, I exercised but as the chemo built up in my system, and the more pregnant I became, I just didn’t have the energy anymore.  I fed my body three square meals a day, all with anti-cancer foods.  The food was fuel and medicine.

HOW DID YOU GET THROUGH THE DAY-TO-DAY OF YOUR CANCER FIGHT?

I was armed with the support of my friends, family and fellowship.  I was completely taken care of.  I surrendered to the healing process, but fought the cancer with everything I had.  I surrounded myself with positive people, asked for help, let people help me and actually enjoyed many moments.  I’ve thought about writing a book called the “Sweet Spots of Cancer” because I was so surprised that I embraced the process with looking for the good.  

HOW DID YOU FIGHT CANCER EMOTIONALLY?

My anti-depressants were my kids, especially pure and sweet Sadie.  I just had and do have so much to live for.  Even knowing that my unborn child needed me kept me going.  My hubby and I grew closer.  I continued to do as much life as I could.  Practicing my faith and belief in God helped tremendously.  I already had walked through having a special needs child. We knew we could handle cancer.

WHAT DOES BEING A SURVIVOR FEEL LIKE?

I am woman.  Hear me roar!  I am tougher than I thought.  It’s just such a huge relief. On the other hand, it’s super hard to readjust to “normal” life.  I’ve had a whirlwind of a year and during that time I had a baby too!  It’s almost like I’m waking up and saying, “Oh, wow, when did this fourth kid come and live here?”.   The calm after the storm with just gray days are actually sometimes more difficult than the high drama of the past cancer-fighting year.

WHAT ADVICE DO YOU HAVE FOR OTHER CANCER FIGHTERS?

Take good care of yourself.  Not just for you, but for the people around you.  Ask for help.  Sleep.  Write.  Shop a little.  Go on walks.  Watch TV.  Read.  Talk.  Cry.  Cry some more.  Laugh.  Eat Well.  Pray.  Thank.

WHAT ADVICE DO YOU HAVE FOR THE MEDICAL PROFESSION?

Keep an open mind to new treatments and ideas.  Anything is possible.

WHAT ADVICE DO YOU HAVE FOR FRIENDS, FAMILY AND CO-WORKERS OF CANCER FIGHTERS?

Buckle your seatbelts and put your own oxygen mask on first.  I made sure my husband and family were not completely putting their lives on hold.  Find healthy outlets.  You’re fighting this together.  It’s sometimes harder for the caregiver than even the patient.

HOW DO YOU FEEL ABOUT THE FUTURE?  WHAT ARE YOUR HOPES AND DREAMS?

I want to live until I’m 120 years old.  I had kids a little later in life so I want to be a fully functional grandma someday.  I just want to be healthy and enjoy watching my kids grow up and make life choices that support healthy and happy living.  I have become more of a giver because of this process.  The people in my life poured money, food, time, energy and love my way when I was sick.  It’s time to give back.

FOR YOU IN ONE WORD, WHAT IS CANCER?

Life.

SMILE FOR CANCER FIGHTERS!

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and add your smile to our WALL OF SMILES

www.thewhyfoundation.org/wall-of-smiles/